Alibaba Recovers From Production Debacle

WUHAN, CHINA - Mr. Wang Hung Lo has been named Executive Vice President of Alibaba Group’s new facemask division. According to an Alibaba press release, Mr. Hung Lo not only saved the corporation from a huge production debacle, but he set a new corporate record for all time profit gouging from unsuspecting westerners. Mr. Hung Lo will transfer over from his former duties as a manufacturing assistant at the Alibaba jockstrap division.

Wang Hung Lo’s storied rise to acclaim happened last year, after Mr. Hung Tzu Loos, president of the jockstrap division, ordered 10 billion units to be produced in pink. Tzu Loos wanted to exploit the west’s fascination with breast cancer, and decided to include the pink concept with the corporation’s jockstrap offerings. The program was a dismal failure, and nearly bankrupted the division.

Mr. Hung Lo, however, noticed an opportunity when he discovered that the corporation’s jockstraps, which were sized for the average asian male, were the same size as a competitor’s face masks made specifically for the overweight American and European markets. Mr. Hung Lo collaborated with the Alibaba infectious disease division to create a new heinous, rampant and novel mystery disease, and after a brief but effective marketing campaign the American and European markets were duped into making face masks mandatory.  

Not only did Mr. Hung Lo sell the 10 billion units, but he managed to sell them for $3US apiece, a huge increase over their former 5 cent US selling price. Additionally, Mr. Hung Lo created whole new product lines, by introducing other designer colors and by placing designer animals and phrases upon the jockstraps / face masks. To date, an additional 100 billion units have been ordered world wide. The genius of Mr. Hung Lo cannot be overstated, as now 93% of all Chinese production has been dedicated to useless and ineffective designer face mask production, making Mr. Hung Lo a true titan in the business world, rivaling Bill Gates and Steve Jobs for corporate influence.