Demolition Derby Recap

 

BONNER COUNTY FAIRGROUNDS, ID - With no Festival and no other entertainment options, the Demolition Derby at the Bonner County Fair was the cultural event of the year, and saw record attendance. An estimated 3,000 plus spectators crammed into the standing room only arena, eight of whom were spotted wearing Covid masks. These lucky fans were treated to a record number of derby entrants who spent well over $5,000 each to try and win a $10 trophy to place on the mantle at home. The Beer Garden was in high gear as well, crushing a keg every ten minutes from an hour before starting time, all the way through the final event.

The entertainment was not limited to the crushing of cars or the county’s favorite drunks all gathered in one place. In the name of racial equality, the Fair hired an anglo Mushmouth to handle the announcing duties and play music during the downtimes. Mushmouth treated the crowd to a full color commentary performed in a combination of Iraqi-Navajo and Drunklish. In between sounds of ‘Abba doobah dinga’ and ‘dablah mehba ploohan’, Mushmouth wooed the crowd by playing the Bonner County favorites YMCA, Thriller, and I Like Big Butts, all with text alert pings every ten seconds, and all in the name of our vast diversity.

The Derby entrants did not disappoint. Three events were run, with a four car field in the compact ‘light’ division, a five car ‘amateur’ field, and a twelve car ‘pro’ class field. The compacts were fun to watch ping pong off of each other, and survived a surprising amount of abuse. The amateurs put out one heck of an effort as well. But the Pros topped the show, with a roll-over and another vehicle up on its side, trying to become a car-b-que. Vehicular mayhem never looked so good, and at the end of the night most of the derby cars reverted back to their status as daily drivers. Win-Win for the crowd and the drivers. As a final note, Panhandle Health, in their Derby coverage, reported that they expect 2,992 new cases of Covid to appear in the next two weeks.