High Council Explains Caribbean Junket

 

7B WIRE - The High Council and the Supreme Leader's office have released a joint statement describing the activities and purpose of their 2018 purchasing junket to Grand Cayman in the Carribean. The statement reads as follows:

"The Supreme Leader and the High Council recently undertook a fact finding mission to Grand Cayman in order to better research and understand the city’s waste disposal needs. In its continual effort to foster green technologies, encourage recycling efforts and reduce landfill tonnage, the Supreme Leader and High Council wanted to see first hand how that small island nation deals with its rubbish problems.

"The trip was of zero cost to the taxpayers, as the trip was fully funded by outside corporate sources. Rest assured that these sources did not influence the High Council’s decision in any way to purchase the city’s new $4,000 garbage cans. Indeed, the High Council signed the purchase agreement and subsequent maintenance contracts at the Hyatt Grand Cayman only after a week-long stay of due diligence and research. The Big Belly garbage cans were found to be the most effective option for replacing the city’s already paid-for fleet of existing garbage cans."

When questioned about the other options which the council investigated, a spokesman said that many, many other options were researched and considered. He went on to say that the council members were finally swayed at the last evening’s seaside cocktail mixer, when it was noted that the 13 gallon garbage can by the bar was overflowing with plastic Mai Tai cups, but the on-site BigBelly garbage can still had a flashing green light, which seemed to indicate that it was happy.

The Council’s spokesman went on to further state that all 156 of the city’s old $1200 garbage cans were disposed of last year. The city at first planned to crush them inside of the new $4,000 BigBelly cans, but was concerned that the BigBelly cans might break during the process. Therefore, the High Council voted to send all of the old cans to the landfill, as they held no value for resale.