Friday, July 17, 2020

Local Hotel Avoids Lawsuit

A local hotel was recently sued for discrimination against car owners, and for promoting “truck driver privelege”. The famous 6th Avenue Hotel, in an attempt to drum up business, lowered its rates to $49.99 nightly, or $24.99 for truck drivers. Both rates were posted on the hotel’s marquis sign. Several potential customers attempted to obtain lodging, but requested the truck driver rate.


The potential lodgers were all denied the special rate, as they could not produce valid Commercial Driver Licences. One of these customers happened to be a recent law school graduate, and he quickly organized a class action lawsuit, alleging discrimination under the 14th and 19th ammenments to the US Constitution.


Winston McFrivolous filed a Notice of Transgressions and Harm with the courthouse and 5th Avenue Hotel Inc, alleging that the rate structure “effectively discriminated against owners of automobiles, including Prius’, Teslas, Volts and other environmentally trendy cars, while rewarding drivers of tractor trailers for destroying the environment and promoting corporate greed.” 


6th Avenue Hotels responded by noting that no rooms had been reserved or rented by any truck drivers during the promotion, and that to appear corporately responsible, they were discontinuing the promotion. McFrivolous then modified the lawsuit, dropping all previous tort claims, and proceeding with the class action under the 21st amendment, alleging that 6th Avenue hotels had violated citizens rights by closing the bar Ritzi’s.  Pretrial motions are currently scheduled for August.


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Merry Xmas from the Moose Droppings

  May you be blessed with family and friends, the people who love you and those that you love. All the rest is bullshit.